Death

It's always strange how death is what we consider to be the most abnormal event in our lives. It strikes us as if it shouldn't happen every time, yet death is the essence of existence. It is common knowledge that there can be no life without death and vice versa. It is also common knowledge that whenever a death happen close to us, we are shaken to our cores.
It doesn't matter if we expect it or not, death is still considered by psychologists to be a violent event which changes us through the significant trauma it represents. So what is it that makes it so scarring?
It should be easy to answer yet there is a complex ramification of causes that can be mentioned.
Firstly, the death of someone close leaves an emptiness that cannot be filled. It could be explained as one of the sparks from our own firework going missing. The firework is still incredible, but it now lacks this tiny little light that made it extra special, and that spark is irremediably gone. This emptiness is difficult to recover from, furthered by the fact that there is absolutely nothing that can be done to change the situation.
The finality of death is one that shocks again and again. Getting used to it is not an option. You can either let your heart sink every time or learn to numb yourself. Either way, there is no healthy or normal way of dealing with it. The five stages of grief are just one of the inexhaustible ways of approaching the loss of someone.

Even after the emptiness left by the loss and its absolute finality, as sentient and conscious beings the link between death and ourselves is also a hard reminder of our own fragility. We are all mortal and our souls, no matter how bright or compassionate or special, will leave our bodies. It is the understanding that we work like machines and that eventually every machine is replaced or has to be destroyed is one that we struggle with accepting. We can embrace this fact or not, death does not discriminate. Death is not just, it is not beautiful, it is not desirable... but it certainly does not discriminate.

The analysis of the impact death has on us as humans can be endless, but I'll stop here. So how do we deal with the loss of someone then?
Well, first of all, we have to embrace all of our emotions. If we are angry at life, then let it be. For a while, at least. However, a perpetual state of anger or sadness does not serve us it destroys us. After accepting the pain, and the loss, there is a time where we also have to accept to rebuild our lives, little by little. In whichever way is possible, make life acceptable again and then, when the time is right for us, make it beautiful.
Because yes, even though we are at a time of  ugliness, life is beautiful. Of course, there are responsibilities and chores and work but if you choose to focus on that aspect of your day, you miss out on other things. If you have to get up early every morning, then think of it as being able to watch the sun rise. If you are crawling under work then think of it as having the privilege of working whether it be to support your family or to get an education in hopes to better your future. This outlook may evidently not work on all situations, but it is by applying it to the little things that life is made more than bearable. Life is made worth living.