I can say confidently that this "yes" has been the most extraordinary and exciting one I've had to pleasure to say thus far. Moving is always special, which meant that even after having grown up in different countries, it was a daunting process. I had no idea how any aspect of my life would unfold abroad, far from family and friends, in a foreign environment and with limited language abilities.
Little did I know I would find myself the happiest I've been in a long while. It is still unknown to me how it took experiencing life in a different city and meeting new people for me to increasingly grow confident in who I am. Every day I get closer to not caring about what "others" think of me, and every day I reach a new level of fulfilment. Oh boy, did it take a lot for me to write those words down, knowing both how tacky and how stupid it was for me to ever care in the first place. Spoiler alert though, I definitely am not claiming I'm tooootally over the whole "how do I come across" fear, but I am headed in the right direction.The words I am typing feel like they could come out of a twelve year old's diary but somehow, they feel right.
It's also been a tad strange for me to figure out how I have been feeling so festive whilst being the furthest away from home I've ever been. I believe that people who say we can just "choose" to be happy are bypassing a range of outside influences which challenge this statement. I also believe that it's possible, no matter what situation you find yourself in to smile at the Christmas lights, to be kind to strangers and to be grateful for the people that do happen to be in your life. Those are not hard rules to live by, but it is unfortunately so easy to forget them every so often. I just happen to find myself in a situation where I am prone to remembering those little things and therefore feel it is the correct time to lay it on my screen. I can appreciate my family more being far away from them just as I can care for my friends more by skyping with them whilst internally longing to hug them, after all, it's not because people move that our memories and relationships have to move away with them.
I think these are the jolly-est holidays I will spend yet, and I sure do hope not to lose that spark I feel is igniting me right now. And if, or when, I do find myself in a dull moment, I sure hope I have my own positive words to go back to -a wish of mine which happens to be a recurring theme in most of what I write.
I was not hoping for anything by moving here, except maybe for some kind of personal development. What I got was way more than I bargained for in the best way possible. I have met wonderful and terribly interesting new people which have made my life that much richer for it. I am learning from every person I hang out with, and they are helping me grow in more ways than they can ever imagine. I may not have been expecting anything at all, not even the worst, but I sure hoped for the best.
This was my ode to Mel Brooks' Hope for the Best, Expect the Worst
